I have to write about this because I know that I will want to remember this a long time from now and I know it will make me smile when I am feeling down.
I got hit on by a student today. Actually, I was asked to have a bottle of wine with him... moscato to be exact. This was after he asked me if I had ever dated an African American man and he said he'd never dated a white girl. Ummmmm excuse me sir, not only are you 6 years younger than me and I am your teacher but I am MARRIED for goodness sakes!
That being said, I've needed some laughs like this recently because I have been feeling pretty stressed out. There are just a lot of different hands to juggle in this job and it's taking awhile to get the swing of things.
Also, if you could pray for a few things I would appreciate it.
1. My computers that I use on a daily basis have not run properly since I started. This really messes up my daily work.
2. I have one particular class that is just crazy. They don't listen, they don't quiet down, they don't work, they don't care. I'm a little stumped on what to do.
Thanks,
Teach
Monday, October 18, 2010
Monday, October 4, 2010
Scars Have a Story
I have been learning more and more about my students individually and their culture as a whole. It's crazy how many of these kids grew up literally "in the hood". This week we are focusing on writing - one of my favorite things to teach. The curriculum I am required to teach provides writing prompts and today's prompt had to do with emergencies. For some of the students it was hard to think up stories so I began asking them if they had any scars and how they got them. I really started to think about how each scar has a story including the scars on the inside. Some of my students had the craziest stories. Three of them showed me their scars from bullet wounds and one of them began telling me about the scar on his neck from when he was in prison and was stabbed in the neck with a sharpened spoon. Um.... OH MY! I'm a white, English teacher in her mid-twenties - not at all from this background. It sure is opening my eyes to the way that others live and how they grew up. It is pretty sad they had to go through all that and only makes my heart open up more to them. i just want to give them love.
xo,
teach
xo,
teach
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Sparkly purple shirt and rapping during breakfast?
I've been meaning to write for awhile but things have been extremely busy with trying to learn a new job. It's been very stressful unfortunately and it seems like every day there is another thing to learn or task to do. I am hoping things will settle down a bit in the next few months.
Last week I attendedf a new student breakfast that they do the morning after new students arrive. This happens on a weekly basis as new students come every Tuesday. It sure makes for never a dull moment. Each new student was supposed to introduce themselves and answer a few questions. Almost all the students had gone and this tall, African American dude wearing a shiny purple button down shirt was up. I mean this guys shirt was like bathing suit material. It looked a little like one of my old gymnastics leotards. Did I mention it was purple - bright purple! Anyway, he stands up and starts talking about himself and he busts into this unbelievable rap. This guy is just rapping for about 2 or 3 minutes. His rap was all about time and how we don't have a lot of it and we should take advantage of it. I literally think my mouth was hanging open. It was nothing like I'd seen in any school before.
So much has been happening lately. I am really learning a lot about dealing with this population of students. I worked in a very impoverished school last year but all of my students were caucasian where the students in this school are 90% African American. There are some similarities but I am learning about their culture and way of life. Last year was such a good preparation for my current job - it is evident why God placed me there now.
I have quite a few English Language Learners in my classes. If you don't know what that means it's that English isn't their first language. One student barely speaks any English - others are much better speakers. I have been learning about teaching these students even though I don't have my ELL certification. One of my ELL students is from Sudan. His parents died when he was young and he came to the US by himself when he was 13. He's been pretty guarded about his past but I'm sure his story is amazing.
Well, today was a positive day - my students got VERY into learning about synonyms. I hope that this continues.
xoxo
Teach
Last week I attendedf a new student breakfast that they do the morning after new students arrive. This happens on a weekly basis as new students come every Tuesday. It sure makes for never a dull moment. Each new student was supposed to introduce themselves and answer a few questions. Almost all the students had gone and this tall, African American dude wearing a shiny purple button down shirt was up. I mean this guys shirt was like bathing suit material. It looked a little like one of my old gymnastics leotards. Did I mention it was purple - bright purple! Anyway, he stands up and starts talking about himself and he busts into this unbelievable rap. This guy is just rapping for about 2 or 3 minutes. His rap was all about time and how we don't have a lot of it and we should take advantage of it. I literally think my mouth was hanging open. It was nothing like I'd seen in any school before.
So much has been happening lately. I am really learning a lot about dealing with this population of students. I worked in a very impoverished school last year but all of my students were caucasian where the students in this school are 90% African American. There are some similarities but I am learning about their culture and way of life. Last year was such a good preparation for my current job - it is evident why God placed me there now.
I have quite a few English Language Learners in my classes. If you don't know what that means it's that English isn't their first language. One student barely speaks any English - others are much better speakers. I have been learning about teaching these students even though I don't have my ELL certification. One of my ELL students is from Sudan. His parents died when he was young and he came to the US by himself when he was 13. He's been pretty guarded about his past but I'm sure his story is amazing.
Well, today was a positive day - my students got VERY into learning about synonyms. I hope that this continues.
xoxo
Teach
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
"Youz a young teacher, we gonna like you"
I have finished my third day of work and it seems to be going well (a lot better than my last year of teaching)!!
The place that I am working (job corps) is a lot different than a school. There are some things about the system that I can really see as a positive. The rules and consequences are VERY structured and specific and the center really holds to them. There is a GREAT deal of conversation between teachers, counselors and RAs (yes, most students live on center). The communication is AMAZING! I have been reading the daily emails from all instructors highlighting which students did exceptional and which ones needed some help (or consequences). This is really the way schools should be - elementary teachers don't have the need necessarily but in middle and high schools this is so vital. I also love the way the center focuses on praising students and recognizing positives. This is not done enough in schools - especially for students like these.
Yesterday I met the sweetest girl - Erin is from close to area (many students live 2 hours away or more). She was a sophomore who was 18 and they said she was working too slowly to get her GED and kicked her out. She wasn't a "problem" student - just slower. What a dis-service to that girl.
Today I talked to Henry. Henry is 19 and was telling me stories about his scars. Henry's mother was a cocaine addict and he referred to himself as a "crack baby". He was born without a bone or muscle in one of his thumbs and a whole in his heart. The only heart they could replace him with had a broken valve that would need to be replaced by the time he was 18 or he would die. He just had surgery a year ago to fix this but they said he still probably wouldn't live to be 26. Most of these problems would not have happened if his mother wouldn't have selfishly done drugs during pregnancy.
Another student has a 2 year old daughter. It's hard to understand where these students are coming from so I just try to love them and not judge them. In Henry's case it was hard not to get angry at his mother for causing the problems (oh and then abandoning him - which I did not mention).
Love working with kids like this - if someone would have told me the type of students I would be working with I would not have believed them :)
Teach
p.s. students keep saying "youz a young teacher, we gonna like you" ha!
The place that I am working (job corps) is a lot different than a school. There are some things about the system that I can really see as a positive. The rules and consequences are VERY structured and specific and the center really holds to them. There is a GREAT deal of conversation between teachers, counselors and RAs (yes, most students live on center). The communication is AMAZING! I have been reading the daily emails from all instructors highlighting which students did exceptional and which ones needed some help (or consequences). This is really the way schools should be - elementary teachers don't have the need necessarily but in middle and high schools this is so vital. I also love the way the center focuses on praising students and recognizing positives. This is not done enough in schools - especially for students like these.
Yesterday I met the sweetest girl - Erin is from close to area (many students live 2 hours away or more). She was a sophomore who was 18 and they said she was working too slowly to get her GED and kicked her out. She wasn't a "problem" student - just slower. What a dis-service to that girl.
Today I talked to Henry. Henry is 19 and was telling me stories about his scars. Henry's mother was a cocaine addict and he referred to himself as a "crack baby". He was born without a bone or muscle in one of his thumbs and a whole in his heart. The only heart they could replace him with had a broken valve that would need to be replaced by the time he was 18 or he would die. He just had surgery a year ago to fix this but they said he still probably wouldn't live to be 26. Most of these problems would not have happened if his mother wouldn't have selfishly done drugs during pregnancy.
Another student has a 2 year old daughter. It's hard to understand where these students are coming from so I just try to love them and not judge them. In Henry's case it was hard not to get angry at his mother for causing the problems (oh and then abandoning him - which I did not mention).
Love working with kids like this - if someone would have told me the type of students I would be working with I would not have believed them :)
Teach
p.s. students keep saying "youz a young teacher, we gonna like you" ha!
Sunday, September 12, 2010
A new job...
Long time no write.
After being laid-off and celebrating the summertime I finally have something to write about. I have just been given a job but not in a conventional school. This will be an interesting year and I promise to update - this time from the beginning. I will be working at a job corp center. The job corp is a program for students who have not been given many opportunities. I will be the reading/literacy teacher. I am still learning a lot about what the job entails and what the job corp is all about. I will update you more on this when my facts are all straight. That being said... I start tomorrow and am nervous!
teach xo
After being laid-off and celebrating the summertime I finally have something to write about. I have just been given a job but not in a conventional school. This will be an interesting year and I promise to update - this time from the beginning. I will be working at a job corp center. The job corp is a program for students who have not been given many opportunities. I will be the reading/literacy teacher. I am still learning a lot about what the job entails and what the job corp is all about. I will update you more on this when my facts are all straight. That being said... I start tomorrow and am nervous!
teach xo
Friday, June 4, 2010
A HUGE Affirmation!
Sorry it's been awhile. There have been so many days where I've thought about writing but with the end of the school year and applying like a mad woman for jobs, it has been one of the last things on my to-do list.
I know many of you have been praying for my student Tara so I will give a quick update on her.
She continues to be cutting herself. This week it was on her stomach. Ouch. She is open with me about doing it which I am glad about but wish I could do more to help. She did tell her sister about being raped and her sister took her to get tested for STDs. Personally, I think she needs some serious counseling but I'm not her guardian. Many days I feel lost with what to do to help her. I try to just listen and pray.
As many of you know, this has been a VERY rough year for me - especially being my first full year of teaching. Today I received a huge affirmation that made my month/year.
When I came to this school I was told that the state test scores were very low. The school is considered a Title 1 school which means many of the students are below grade level and struggle to learn. They were hiring a new Language Arts teacher this year because they wanted to improve state test scores. One of the main school goals this year was to improve writing skills. Last year, my 8th grade students did pretty poorly on the state test. Many did not pass the writing and a lot got a 1 or 2 (scale of 6). We just received our test scores for this year and 100% of my 8th graders got a 4 or better on the writing portion of the test. They also got the highest passing percentage for the Language Arts portion (76%). The fact that ALL MY STUDENTS passed the writing and improved the scores a ton was such a huge affirmation that I can indeed teach. I'm smiling ear to ear!!!!
Teach
I know many of you have been praying for my student Tara so I will give a quick update on her.
She continues to be cutting herself. This week it was on her stomach. Ouch. She is open with me about doing it which I am glad about but wish I could do more to help. She did tell her sister about being raped and her sister took her to get tested for STDs. Personally, I think she needs some serious counseling but I'm not her guardian. Many days I feel lost with what to do to help her. I try to just listen and pray.
As many of you know, this has been a VERY rough year for me - especially being my first full year of teaching. Today I received a huge affirmation that made my month/year.
When I came to this school I was told that the state test scores were very low. The school is considered a Title 1 school which means many of the students are below grade level and struggle to learn. They were hiring a new Language Arts teacher this year because they wanted to improve state test scores. One of the main school goals this year was to improve writing skills. Last year, my 8th grade students did pretty poorly on the state test. Many did not pass the writing and a lot got a 1 or 2 (scale of 6). We just received our test scores for this year and 100% of my 8th graders got a 4 or better on the writing portion of the test. They also got the highest passing percentage for the Language Arts portion (76%). The fact that ALL MY STUDENTS passed the writing and improved the scores a ton was such a huge affirmation that I can indeed teach. I'm smiling ear to ear!!!!
Teach
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
My Heart Hurts for Her
This morning I woke up and like usual I checked my facebook account :) I am not friends with my students on facebook while I am their teacher because it isn't very professional. I had a message from a student (which you can do even if you aren't friends). This is how it read (name is changed).
Mrs. -
I really need to talk to you... I'm not doing too great...everything isn't going as planned. Like when I moved up here it was supposed to be better for me but it just seems to be tearing me apart even more than before....You know how I told you how I used to cut (her wrists) .... well I did it again. And i don't want anyone else to find out because I don't feel like going to my stupid therapist again. She didn't help out any. I just wanted to talk to you... I would talk to my mom or sister about it but they would just yell at me and tell me how stupid I am for doing it. I'm just ready to get out of this school, I don't think this many people have ever hated me in my life. At my old school I never got picked on or talked about. But here everything seems to be opposite. - Tara
The moment I read the message I felt anxious about this girl. She moved to my school in January and has quickly become one of my favorite students. She is sweet and hardworking with a great sense of humor and is easy to relate to. There are many days when she has stood up for me when her classmates have been cruel. I quickly messaged back to urge her to come to school and we would talk. On my ride to school I felt sick because I was worried about her. I immediately began to beg God to give me wisdom in how to handle the situation. I prayed specifically for Tara and for me to have the right words to say.
I was able to talk to Tara during 3rd period.. Luckily a teacher covered my class and I got her out of her class. I could tell that she had been crying and she just looked upset. I sat her down and basically told her that I was there to listen, we would work things out and there was hope. I told her some of my personal struggles with depression so that she would feel comfortable being so open with me. I told her I felt honored that she would talk to me about these things. Then I told her to talk - I was here to listen. I asked a few questions along the way but this is what she basically told me.
Her parents divorced about 2 years ago. Before they divorced she would sit in her bedroom and plug her ears to drown out their yelling. When her mom left her dad she was dropped off at a church so that she would be safe.
After their divorced she lived with her mom and they fought often. This is when she began cutting her wrists. Her mom was frustrated with her and so she shipped her off to her dad's (who now lived in Georgia). Things were even worse at her dad's. He was a drug user and so was her sister who was also living there. Her sister became pregnant by a young man and when she was almost 9 months pregnant and sick she encouraged Tara to hang out with the father to keep him occupied. So her sister's boyfriend and "baby daddy" raped Tara. As I sat at the table and she told me this through tears (she could barely choke it out) I began crying and just felt so overwhelmed with grief for this young lady. I just cried to her "I'm so sorry this happened. How awful how awful."
Child protective services then pulled her out of her dad's because he was physically abusing her and constantly yelling. She moved back with her mom and began using marijuana. She came to the town I teach in to visit her sister over Christmas break. Her mom called and said ... stay there. I'm sick of you. You mean NOTHING to me. That is how she got to this school, in my classroom. She is still struggling with issues between her parents. Her mom tells her often that she is worthless and a "mistake". Poor Tara feels so unwanted.
We had to go back to class but I am meeting her for lunch tomorrow. We are going to come up with some things to look forward to and some hope. This girl needs hope. She needs to know that her life is not going to always be like this. If you're reading this I invite you to pray for Tara. I know that's not her real name but pray for her and her peace and that I would be wise enough to lead her through this valley.
Teach
Mrs. -
I really need to talk to you... I'm not doing too great...everything isn't going as planned. Like when I moved up here it was supposed to be better for me but it just seems to be tearing me apart even more than before....You know how I told you how I used to cut (her wrists) .... well I did it again. And i don't want anyone else to find out because I don't feel like going to my stupid therapist again. She didn't help out any. I just wanted to talk to you... I would talk to my mom or sister about it but they would just yell at me and tell me how stupid I am for doing it. I'm just ready to get out of this school, I don't think this many people have ever hated me in my life. At my old school I never got picked on or talked about. But here everything seems to be opposite. - Tara
The moment I read the message I felt anxious about this girl. She moved to my school in January and has quickly become one of my favorite students. She is sweet and hardworking with a great sense of humor and is easy to relate to. There are many days when she has stood up for me when her classmates have been cruel. I quickly messaged back to urge her to come to school and we would talk. On my ride to school I felt sick because I was worried about her. I immediately began to beg God to give me wisdom in how to handle the situation. I prayed specifically for Tara and for me to have the right words to say.
I was able to talk to Tara during 3rd period.. Luckily a teacher covered my class and I got her out of her class. I could tell that she had been crying and she just looked upset. I sat her down and basically told her that I was there to listen, we would work things out and there was hope. I told her some of my personal struggles with depression so that she would feel comfortable being so open with me. I told her I felt honored that she would talk to me about these things. Then I told her to talk - I was here to listen. I asked a few questions along the way but this is what she basically told me.
Her parents divorced about 2 years ago. Before they divorced she would sit in her bedroom and plug her ears to drown out their yelling. When her mom left her dad she was dropped off at a church so that she would be safe.
After their divorced she lived with her mom and they fought often. This is when she began cutting her wrists. Her mom was frustrated with her and so she shipped her off to her dad's (who now lived in Georgia). Things were even worse at her dad's. He was a drug user and so was her sister who was also living there. Her sister became pregnant by a young man and when she was almost 9 months pregnant and sick she encouraged Tara to hang out with the father to keep him occupied. So her sister's boyfriend and "baby daddy" raped Tara. As I sat at the table and she told me this through tears (she could barely choke it out) I began crying and just felt so overwhelmed with grief for this young lady. I just cried to her "I'm so sorry this happened. How awful how awful."
Child protective services then pulled her out of her dad's because he was physically abusing her and constantly yelling. She moved back with her mom and began using marijuana. She came to the town I teach in to visit her sister over Christmas break. Her mom called and said ... stay there. I'm sick of you. You mean NOTHING to me. That is how she got to this school, in my classroom. She is still struggling with issues between her parents. Her mom tells her often that she is worthless and a "mistake". Poor Tara feels so unwanted.
We had to go back to class but I am meeting her for lunch tomorrow. We are going to come up with some things to look forward to and some hope. This girl needs hope. She needs to know that her life is not going to always be like this. If you're reading this I invite you to pray for Tara. I know that's not her real name but pray for her and her peace and that I would be wise enough to lead her through this valley.
Teach
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